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February 3rd, 2008
a wolf at the door
i have nothing ive never never been so lonely before i have no hope that this is gonna pass fuck, there are alot of things i need to say to a few, but i know they wont listen, anyways, ive had enough chances. i went to far. i dont know how im going to fall asleep tonight, or how I am going to wake up tomorrow.
THIS IS ALL MY DOING I HAVE TO LIVE WITH THIS EVERYDAY THIS IS THE PUNISHMENT OF ALL PUNISHMENTS.
i cant even cry anymore, im all dried up. just the heavy feeling in my chest wont go away.
there are memories in every photograph I have. there are memories In my bathroom. all over my walls. in the living room. my car. everything.
Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong- Love is here today
things are great. cal arts shit is awesome. I am sleep deprived but thats ok. I'm just lonely, I mean I have plenty of friends. But thats not the kind of lonely I am talking about. i hate the word lonely, but i cant manage to find a synonym for it.